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The liposuction diaries - Beach blanket boogie - 14 March 2008
Posted by Felicity 3 comments
See what I mean about the thighs?
Next week I’m off to Dubai for a week in the sun, and to catch up with some dear intrepid friends who decided to take up the expat life. Sounds like fun? Definitely. Except for the fact that, as we all know, I’ve been banging on about my thighs for months and this will be the first airing of their dimply glory for a good half year.
It’s T- minus five days and counting, and I have embarked on the following preventative yet completely fruitless measures:
- Only eating tinned tuna and salad, but keeping the wine (a girl’s got to have something to look forward to)
- Panic-induced online buying of a new brown polka dot bikini (surely this will be the one that shows me to be the true goddess that I really am?! Well it looked nice on Caprice….)
- Panic-induced online buying of a black kaftan with pretty lace edging (just in case the bikini doesn’t live up to expectations)
- Booking a mini MOT – that is, a pedicure and a bikini wax (both utterly essential), plus a visit to the hairdresser for a roots touch-up
- Panic-induced visit to Superdrug to stock up on fake tan – no time for a professional spray now – boy, do I wish I’d got my act together – orange palms, here we come!
- Buying some cute yet very cheap sandals (because after the mini MOT, budget will not stretch any further)
So, though all of this should serve to minimize the “ripple effect”, I still have that first moment of dread and shame to look forward to when I expose my snow-white limbs to the world. I’m now determined that this will be the last holiday I have which will invoke beach paranoia – I’m there to have a good time, for goodness sake, not worry about how I look! Good thing my next step after the trip is my first session of Ultra Shape (for the thighs), which I’ll then be following with the Laser Lipo (for the love handles). Technology has not advanced far enough yet to get rid of the knee flab, so I suppose I’ll have to live with that for a bit longer. Nevertheless, Felicity’s Sun Holiday Number Two in August 2008 will hopefully see me looking svelte and fabulous, thanks to the miracle of modern cosmetic surgery….
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Comments
1. Joanna - March 14, 2008
I think you look fine! Surely everyone has the fear of stripping off on the beach? That Boots advert moment when you think everyone is looking at you in your bikini and whispering 'Oh my god, can you see that girl over there? Doesn't she REALISE?!'
Good luck on your journey - and try and enjoy your holiday anyway?
2. Jann Jones - March 20, 2008
Have a look around when you get on the beach or by the pool , i have this panic every time i go on hol you will find a lot bigger than you still parading around in their bikinis you are there to enjoy yourself not get upset because you don't have a perfect bod,who does? If all else fails go and sit next to the largest person you can find you will soon feel thin. Go enjoy
3. Hugh - March 20, 2008
Hi there, I think you look great.
I think you should worry about all those things when you come back not when you're going on holidays.
What kind of holidays would leave you eating salads everyday (unless thats what makes you happy)? I'd be depressed the whole time if it was me, really. The purpose of your trip should be for you to relax and forget about what makes you unhappy (at least for those few days).
If what you really want is to get in shape, 30 min of fitness 4 days a week should do the trick.
Have a good time,
H